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I am having difficulty logging into my blog. I think there is something wrong with the tripod service. Am thinking of switching to a different blog site. Will update you if there is a move.
Doing well. Maximum dosage of Geodone is doing the trick. Be well. Blessings to you all.
Sunday, 15 October 2006 - 6:13 PM EDT
Name: "Matthew"
Just wanted to see from other's who have been diagnosed with "scizophrenia" , do you think that taking medication decreases your creativity or imagination. I trust my doctor but I am somewhat fearful for if I'll even have any creative drive left after taking risperdal for an extended period?!!
thanks
Tuesday, 17 October 2006 - 12:26 PM EDT
Name: "Karen Blair"
I wrote you a long post Matthew and my damn machine ate it.
I'll try to recap.
Schizophrenia is a loss of ability and drive in itself. I can't create when I am having schizophrenic symptoms, my head is too disorganized. I create when my thinking is clear and my emotions are focused and calm. When I took Risperdal I was very happy with my creations, they were rather primative and primal with a lot of the oddness of my illness bleeding through into the picture.
Creativity is a wild energy that is harnessed, controled and directed into a concrete form (music) or medium (paint). Schizophrenia is a wild energy that tears the emotions and logical thought and even will power to shreds. I view taking medication as an adjunct to the creative process; because my medication mends my mind and thought patterns I can work longer hours at being creative.
I won't bullshit you, the medication shuts down some of the person along with some of the illness. But this illness is itself a destroyer of the self and the abilities of the mind. As far as I can tell, the anti-psychotic medication will only make your mind stronger and better able to create. The visionary poet and painter William Blake saw angels in trees but he wrote, "Art is Practice". There is a lot of hard work involved in creation and the drugs will give you emotional stability and stamina to get the work done. Inspiration is less often given to me for free, usually I have to go looking for it and that is very hard. The energy of schizophrenia is deceptive. It feels like free inspiration, it feels very creative, but I've seen so many schizophrenics unable to get creative work done because they were busy being symptomatic, chasing after faries in their mind.
Besides trusting your doctor, do some research into what schizophrenia is. That will take some courage. What you will read about yourself will feel very sad. But I promise you, everything that I have accomplised that is precious to me - a stable marriage, good relationship with my relatives, a volunteer job at a museum, a large body of artwork and this website itself is all a direct result of taking medication.
If you want to talk some more I would be happy to, please email me though.
Take care of yourself.
Tuesday, 17 October 2006 - 1:33 PM EDT
Name: "JSR"I would agree with Karen--without meds I would not have the presence of mind needed to create. Meds help clear my thoughts and allow me to paint and write. I can't write or paint if I'm having disturbing thoughts. The meds give me sanity and presence of mind; without them I couldn't do any art.
Sunday, 29 October 2006 - 9:26 PM EST
Name: "Matthew"
I wrote you a long post Matthew and my damn machine ate it.
I'll try to recap.
Schizophrenia is a loss of ability and drive in itself. I can't create when I am having schizophrenic symptoms, my head is too disorganized. I create when my thinking is clear and my emotions are focused and calm. When I took Risperdal I was very happy with my creations, they were rather primative and primal with a lot of the oddness of my illness bleeding through into the picture.
Creativity is a wild energy that is harnessed, controled and directed into a concrete form (music) or medium (paint). Schizophrenia is a wild energy that tears the emotions and logical thought and even will power to shreds. I view taking medication as an adjunct to the creative process; because my medication mends my mind and thought patterns I can work longer hours at being creative.
I won't bullshit you, the medication shuts down some of the person along with some of the illness. But this illness is itself a destroyer of the self and the abilities of the mind. As far as I can tell, the anti-psychotic medication will only make your mind stronger and better able to create. The visionary poet and painter William Blake saw angels in trees but he wrote, "Art is Practice". There is a lot of hard work involved in creation and the drugs will give you emotional stability and stamina to get the work done. Inspiration is less often given to me for free, usually I have to go looking for it and that is very hard. The energy of schizophrenia is deceptive. It feels like free inspiration, it feels very creative, but I've seen so many schizophrenics unable to get creative work done because they were busy being symptomatic, chasing after faries in their mind.
Besides trusting your doctor, do some research into what schizophrenia is. That will take some courage. What you will read about yourself will feel very sad. But I promise you, everything that I have accomplised that is precious to me - a stable marriage, good relationship with my relatives, a volunteer job at a museum, a large body of artwork and this website itself is all a direct result of taking medication.
If you want to talk some more I would be happy to, please email me though.
Take care of yourself.
